Thursday, May 24

Dearly Beloved, Lets Get Ready To Rumble!

My sister's boyfriend works as a DJ, and as such my sister gets +1 free entry into lots of weddings.

And as such she's been imparting me with her great wisdom of Wedding Horror Stories, the Wedding's that when wrong when her boyfriend was 'DJ'ing'

1. The Rained out Wedding
During one wedding reception, the hotel caught on fire. To prevent the place from burning down the emergency sprinklers came on, and a wet, slightly sobered wedding party was removed to the evacuation point on the hotel greens while the Fire Engines tackled the blaze

2. Glad I crashed the Wedding
When a wedding reception was crashed by a group of uninvited drunk men, the bride assumed it was the grooms fault and an argument started. In the meantime the crashers got out of control, the police were called and a riot commenced. By the end of the night people were falling through windows.

3. This man is Best
And finally (and I fear the most likely kind of thing to happen at our wedding) when the 'happy couple' were a little drunk, the groom decided the bride was dancing a little too ‘close’ to the best man.
It is not, it seems, the best idea to accuse the bride of adultery on her Wedding night, I imagine many flowers were thrown, and eventually the bride took the keys and stormed off in the wedding car. The groom was left behind.
In the meantime, wishing to be as useful as possible, my sister helped herself to the buffet to make sure no food was wasted.

Exactly why my sister told me these I can’t be sure, but it has had at least one positive outcome.

Her boyfriend will not be the DJ at our Wedding Reception.

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7 comments:

Thoughloversbelost said...

Yikes!

Add this horror story too...

Mom and I went to a co-worker's wedding last year. Apparently her father had passed away the year before. Well, as her various relatives get up to speak, each of them brings up the deceased father, plus other relatives who were deceased. By the time the last one had completed his speech, the whole head table was wailing and sobbing and weeping. Ugh. Someone really needed to give them some etiquette for speech making. The general consensus around our table was it was really tacky. If they wanted to do those kind of speeches, they should have done it at the rehearsal dinner.

Funniest wedding story...

A friend of mine gets married almost 20 years ago now. At the time, he was a jail guard... wait, "correctional officer"... and she was a jail guard. Now, you have to picture his soon to be wife, she stands about 6'4", has shoulders like an NFL linebacker, and she's no Twiggy. Built like a tank some said. Well, comes time for the vows at the church, and she's crying so hard she can't speak. Finally, the flower girl gets fed up and crosses her arms and lets out this huge, loud, sigh, and the entire church bursts out laughing. Good thing too, as us ushers were looking at each other, when one whispered, think they'd notice if we nicked out for a smoke? Then, at the reception, his co-workers knowing his penchant for pizza, ordered one to be delivered to the banquet hall. Well, picture a room of 400+ fairly liquored-up people, and this skinny little pizza delivery kid wanders in. Way too funny.

But, the best is yet to come.

Comes time for each of the ushers to have their dance with the bride. She wrapped her arms around me, picked me up, carried me around the dance floor and set me down. Thank heavens it was one of my lighter years :-) Anyway, he would not believe the story... until the wedding proofs came from the photographer, and he could see the gap (about 2") between the bottom of my shoes and the floor.

That was the first time a woman ever swept me off my feet! And trust me, it was the last time too!

My Reflecting Pool said...

my dress, my groom, the venue and my flowers made my wedding day memorable. The rest of it was an overpriced disappointment.

big sis. said...

hahaha.. can't believe you actually blogged that.
Glad anyway your not booking col to dj. Its way to embarassing for me when he does., and it gives me a drinking buddy in the corner.
Plus i get to nag him bout my little brother getting married before me and make him sweat for a while.. (i don't want a wedding, just a pretty ring)
love ya..x

Webmiztris said...

ha! just elope. it's SOOOOOOO much easier. My husband and I just did it on a whim one weekend. I've never regretted it!

whenn said...

Lol! Oh my word, I'll keep my fingers crossed for your wedding!!

whenn said...

P.S How do you get your PPP posts to not take comments? I'd like to do that too.

Anonymous said...

Here is a horrifying account of a wedding reception I attended in Delaware Saturday night.

Delaware City Fire Hall in Delaware City, Delaware Ruined Wedding Reception

I hope this blog assists couples (and anyone else) who is considering using Delaware City Fire Hall in Delaware City, Delaware for their wedding receptions. Here is a horrific experience that took place at a wedding reception at Delaware City Fire Hall that I attended in June 2007.

When guests began to arrive at the Delaware City Fire Hall for a wedding reception around 5:00 PM, they were greeted by stifling hot temperatures inside the the building. When the mother of the groom asked a bar tender to turn the air conditioning down, he said he would get to it. After 15 minutes, she had to ask him again, and he said he still didn't do it. He then left the bar area and returned to tell the groom's mother that the air conditioner was never turned on. It took about an hour for the Delaware City Fire Hall to cool down. Since the outside temperature was in the mid-80s, it was not pleasant.

The wedding party arrived, was introduced by the MC, and sat at their head table. By the time they were seated, the bar was closed, and they had no drinks. After looking around, I realized there was no water at any table. No water glasses, no water pitchers, nothing. (You would think a fire hall with fire trucks and such would at least have some water!) Members of the wedding party asked the Delaware City Fire Hall staff for some water, and they refused saying water was "not in the contract." As a courtesy, they brought out 2 pitchers of water (for an entire room full of guests) and left them at the bar. Are you kidding me?????

One of the groomsmen gave a blessing, and the best man was prepared to give his speech and toast. However, while there were champagne glasses for each guest, there was no champagne. The best man and groom asked the bartender, who was apparently doubling as the Delaware City Fire Hall manager, where the champagne was, and some crazy kitchen worker again began yelling that champagne "is not in the contract." After getting a copy of the contract and showing that champagne was indeed in the contract, the groom was met with the reality that the Delaware City Fire Hall didn't have any champagne! Did they forgot to purchase it" Who knows. No one could get a straight answer. Apparently, one of the incompetent Delaware City Fire Hall workers went to buy the champagne after the bride and groom complained, but there was no evidence of that since the champagne never showed up on anyone's table. Plus, the over-zealous bartender, who seemed more interested in causing problems than solving them, proved his lack of inter-personal and problem-solving skills when he began yelling at the best man who was trying to fix the champagne and water situation! The Napoleonic Delaware City Fire Hall bartender attempted to flex some muscle by telling the best man to leave his kitchen or he would have him physically escorted out of the kitchen. (I think the little fella was watching too much of that show "Hell's Kitchen" on Fox TV.) The bartender then began to tell everyone that he was a Delaware State Trooper. I pray to God that no other troopers act like that guy.

Now comes times for the buffet dinner. The head table was supposed to be served their meals, but the Delaware City Fire Hall staff managed to even screw that up. Keeping in mind that the wedding party was about to die of thirst because on no water, no drinks from the bar, and the searing heat of the late-air-conditioned hall, they were at their wits' ends. Their meals were served (did I mention with no drinks?), and then mid-way through the meal some crazy old guy comes by in cutoff shorts, sneakers, and a T-shirt serving salads. There was no rhyme or reason to the timing of the salads' arrival, and the guy looked like he just cut his lawn. After the entrees were half gone and after the salads came, a woman showed up with one pitcher of water. She put the pitcher on the head table, then inexplicably took it away and placed it at the bar. What the hell is going on with the Delaware City Fire Hall?

Okay. Things could not get any worse...until it came time to cut the cake. The Delaware City Fire Hall staff refused to provide plates or utensils for the cake. Again, they kept reverting back to the "contract." OK. Let me paint the picture. There are crazy old people running around in gardening clothes and even more crazy people yelling about contracts. There is a moonlighting cop tending bar picking fights with wedding party members. It's hot as hell. There is no champagne. The parents are screaming. And the bride is crying. Yes, this is the picture of the wedding reception that took place at the Delaware City Fire Hall.

After no one could stand the incompetence any longer, a mother began arguing with the bartender/manager/cop/UFC champion. Get this. This guy, who had no clue how to fix any of the problems (because, at his own admission, he said the "hall manager" was out of town) states that he is "shutting the entire reception down." Yee haa! How fitting for this guy! To make things worse, he calls the police and lies to them, saying that people were being disorderly. I saw no disorder. I saw parents dancing with 7-year-olds, grandparents dancing with grandchildren, and people trying to salvage what they could of a wedding that was horrible ruined by the Delaware City Fire Hall, their incompetent staff, and this one bartender guy who needed someone there to help him manage the facility like a professional.

So, the Delaware City cop shows up, accompanied by (this is a good one) a Delaware Department of Natural Resources officer (yes, that would be a game warden). The DJ is still spinning records and the guests are oblivious because the bartender pseudo-manager guy didn't tell any of the guests to leave. Four New Castle County Police officers then show up, but by this time 75% of the guests left the Delaware City Fire Hall because they truly couldn't take any more.

I don't want to sway anyone's opinion, and I encourage everyone to make their own judgments. However, this is just one example of the type of service that could occur if you rent the Delaware City Fire Hall for your wedding reception or event.

See http://www.deweddingreceptions.blogspot.com

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